I am still thinking about the blog and how I want to approach it. How do you guys feel about it? What would you do if someone creepy came up to you and started talking about your family as if they knew everything about you? I know a lot of you have gone private. What about those of you who haven't gone private? What are your feelings?
Just trying to see what my options are. Because really, it is wonderful and easy and convenient to be able to just post one thing and know that your friends and family are all updated whenever they decide to look. And it's pretty cool to share things with others that are good and helpful, even uplifting. I just don't want to flatter myself by thinking that if I go private, people are going to care enough to keep checking in, you know? I figure that by leaving it public, the convenience will keep you tuned in. Hmmm...
Here are some questions I have been wondering about: (I'd love your input)
Do you ever feel like you are having to compete with others to make sure your life sounds fascinating and exciting on your blog?
Do you ever embellish or feel like you have to "keep up" with what the other gals are blogging about?
Do you ever end up feeling bad because another person seems to have a more "ideal" life than you?
Do you think we should blog about the not-so-good things as well as the good things?
What do you think the main purpose of blogging is?
Is blogging an outlet for you, or a chore?
Is is merely a way to let your family and friends know what you're up to?
Do you think it ever ends up being more than that?
Do you ever refrain from posting certain things because you don't want others to think you're bragging?
Or do you ever post things, fully aware that people might think you're bragging (or maybe you really are just wanting to brag?)
I guess what it all boils down to is your own personal security. Should I feel like I need to prove that my life is just as interesting and fabulous as Miss Thang? We all have different lives and different stories. Different families. Different backgrounds. Different experiences. Different struggles. Different skills. Different weaknesses. Different dreams. Different opinions. It would never be fair for you to compare your life with someone else's life. Never, ever. So really, it would do no good to try to make your life look more glamorous on your blog than it really is. But if you did, it shouldn't matter to anyone else anyway. Because if each person were seeking to please the One who really matters, all of our eyes would be aiming up toward Him and not from side to side. Right? So the question is, what is your motivation to keep on posting... to keep on writing? I would love to know.
I admit that usually when I would think about what to post, I would wonder if it would seem impressive. I would wonder if I should only pick the photos that looked the best. I would try to leave out the boring parts or not-so-fun parts.
The more I live, the more I realize that we all have great qualities, and we all have things we struggle with. The cool thing, is that we are all on the same team. Initially, we all made the same decision to be here. That means we all have one huge thing in common... we all want to figure things out. We all want to do the best we can with what we've been given. It's so cool to me to imagine all of us wearing the same jerseys. When I struggle, feeling like others are trying to compete with me, or put me down, I just try to remember that we have matching jerseys.
So where was I going with all this? Maybe in 2009 we can all set a goal to help each other. Maybe we should try a little harder to be friendly and encouraging to others. Maybe we can shift our focus from the inside to the outside. It's so easy to forget that the only way to really find happiness is to seek to make someone else happy. Isn't it funny how we try so hard to please ourselves and be happy, and we're really only chasing our tails? I don't know how many times I have to get knocked over the head with a baseball bat to realize that.
Well, on my very very long list of new year resolutions, I think you will see that I just added several more. I appreciate your input and your patience with my ramblings.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
20 comments:
Oh man, awesome post. I could not agree with your feelings more. I totally get what you are saying, and i HOPE that I am not one of those bloggers who seems to be bragging. I would say, and I do, post about the struggles and the boring stuff. I am honestly surprised anyone would read my blog, as I post about silly things like going on walks and playing in the sand. I think you should post about what makes you sad, what makes you happy, and how you feel, etc. Post about whatever you feel comfortable sharing. I started our blog as a way to keep people updated on Matt's progress. It turned into a Kaden fan site after he was born, and you know how it is, moms are obsessed with their kids. That is OKAY! I say, if you want to talk about things that make you happy, then do it, no matter how it sounds. I love to get excited about the little things, so I post them. I forgot half the stuff I was going to say, but I think you should blog about whatever the heck you want, put up "bad" pictures, and do it how you want to. I would still check up on you even if you were to go private because I love the stuff you write about. You post simple things and pictures, but you also post the REAL stuff, the thoughts you have, and the insightful and spiritual things you feel. You are lovely, honestly I believe that, and I think you need to be you and be proud of it, whether you post it for the world to see or not.
Oh, and sorry for all that rambling, I probably could have gone on more and more.
oh, and also, I love that song you have up. I used to be able to play part of it on the piano. But, I can't anymore. I haven't practiced in 8 years! I know...bad, bad boston.
I don't know what I would do with a stalker person. But I am a "lurker" on your blog! But at least you know who I am and not some stranger! (at least I hope) Well anyways, I keep a blog mainly so family that I don't see very often can know what we are up to. It has turned into sort of a journal for me. I blog everyday things, not so extraordinary but I also blog things that mean something to me. Maybe it doesn't mean anything to anyone else. So that's my two cents. But I do understand why some people would choose to go private. I probably would consider it seriously if I had some weirdo stalking me...
Hey Katie!
Well, I just talked to you a little about it. I am so so far away and I love blogs as a way to keep in touch. Sometimes I think other people are posting weird things on their blog (or boastful things, or tacky things, or whatever) and I just remind myself- HEY. It's their blog. If I think it's annoying I don't read it. I've never thought that way about your blog, though! It is so cute and I love keeping up with what you're doing and how big your boys are getting. I'm too lazy to email, ya know? :)
So- here are the answers to your questions...
Why do I blog? Mostly for grandmas. I miss living close to my family and I want them all to see lots of pictures of the kids and feel like they know them. I also love it because I publish it at the end of each year for a journal. Do I ever feel like I have to compete? Nope. I don't really care what other people think of my life. I do tend to accentuate the positive, because that is what I love to remember. I don't vent or complain or point out the negatives because that just drags me (and other people) down. I love keeping it happy. Do I feel like I need to keep up? Well, I don't read that many blogs, so I don't really know. I love looking at friends' blogs, but I just love everyone whose blog I look at, so I just love seeing everyone's personalities and lives. Blogging is fun for me- because I know my mom and K's mom and grandparents and aunties are anxious to see something new. I don't care if other people think I am bragging our weird or raising my kids wrong because it just really doesn't matter to me. Sometimes I brag about my kids (and I know I'm bragging!) because I think they're wonderful and when they look back at the books I print for them I want them to know how much I love them and how proud of them I am. Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't because I know other people are reading who don't want to hear it, but then I think of who I'm really bragging to- grandmas (who love it) and my kids journals. Everyone else can just stop reading if it bothers them! :) On going private I obviously have an opinion. It's important for my family- maybe because of special circumstances and maybe not. I think it's always a good idea. I keep myself signed in, so it's not any harder to look at my friends' who have gone private. I know the people who really want to look still will!
So... I hope you still blog! It makes me feel like we are in touch and like I see you all the time and like I know your cute little boys. The only negative things I have found about making the blog private are- 1. I used to really run into old friends via the blog, now I can't. I'm on facebook now though, and I really don't think people who don't even have my email address don't really need to know all the details of my life anyway, ya know? 2. You can invite 100 people to view your blog. Now that we're moving lots of good friends from the ward want to keep in touch that way, as well as tons of family and lots of friends from home, so sometimes I worry I'll hit my max. Oh well. The important people can see it for sure already.
I love you! It was a great post- especially the end. I hope we can all use our blogs as a way to uplift and help each other.
Interesting...I don'to really have an opinion on the whole private/public issue because it hasn't been a big concern for me. I liked your questions. Having a blog for me started out as a way to keep far-away family updated on the happenings of our family but the most gratifying posts for me have been when I've just let loose and wrote out my thoughts and feelings or posted questions. I love getting feedback from other people and feeling like I am connecting with them. I guess that's what a blog means to me: connecting.
oh and p.s.
Tonight for dinner my mom made noodles and mashed potatoes and corn and applesauce. I thuoght it sounded yummy. Talk to you tomorrow. Your friend, Trish
(thought you'd get a laugh out of that!)
Are you using the blog to replace a Journal? Should you replace your last paragraph with "me's and I's"? Same with Facebook. Once you get over 300 friends, whats the point besides asking them all to just look at you. It's also hard to keep up with the stories you tell when anyone and everyone can read them. I'm ready to cancel my facebook and blog because eveyone thinks they know me by reading them and won't pick up the phone and call me. I say, It shouldn't be about popularity. Go back to e-mailing the people that care.
the purpose of your blog is up to you. i blog because i like to connect with people and i like to tell and read stories.
as far as the "private" setting goes: you can protect your privacy without setting your blog as private. protect your privacy by not using names (use nicknames or initials instead), not telling your exact location (use generalities), not posting pictures that show exactly who and where you are (don't post a picture of your house with address). you can proactively protect your privacy without setting your blog as private.
oh, and if creepy comments bug ya, you can eithe turn off the comment functionality, or you can "moderate" comments. then you get to screen them before they go up.
and there are lots of widgets to keep track of who's visiting your blog. if you want to do that.
okay, i think that's it.
My dear sweet Anonymous,
Thanks so much for pointing that out! I apologize to anyone who might have been offended by me assuming that we all have to be a little more friendly. I should definitely change the "we's" to "I's". Maybe I will.
I am deeply touched that you still read my blog so faithfully, and would take the time to write such a profoud comment for me. I am honored. I am just sad that you didn't sign your name, so I could give you proper credit for your words of wisdom.
P.S. I hope you had a great birthday!!
Katie, I feel some of the things you feel but I like what Liz wrote..."Its your blog". I like keeping my family and friends updated and they can come and look at it when they have the time. I feel like I blog about the more exciting things in our life, because who wants to hear about the boring days. I like to try and keep it positive and journal about silly things sometimes. I think you gotta just let loose baby!
PS- How was your birthday? I hope great!
Oh and about the last part of your post...I dont make new years resolutions. I have never, ever kept one that I have made and so for the past few years I dont even bother making any. I start to feel overwhelmed and tied down because no one can do it all and I feel emence pessure of the list I had made. So I have done away with that. But those who can do it, more power to ya. And I think that you are great and have many special talents that you have been blessed. Everyone is so different and we all fail and we all have are moments of success. I liked what you said about us helping eachother do better, wouldnt that solve alot of todays problems with the world if we all were worried about others instead of ourselves. Kudos!
Katie,
I have thought about many of those qeustions too. I have not gone public because I am not too worried about stalkers, yet. If I had kids I probably would go private but then again I am like Boston, it can be used as a missionary tool also. But if I had someone weird come up to me and tell me something about my life or kids, i probably would go private.
To some of the questions: No, I dont' feel like I have to "keep up" with others and their lives-like as in "keep up with the jones'". I don't blog to brag about my life I just like to blog about our lives and what we are doing. I feel like I have been able to keep this as my journal/scrapbook because I am not very good at journaling or scraping lately! And I don't think others blog to brag. I love hearing about all my friends near and far and what they are doing! WIth our blogs, we all have been able to keep in touch better. And have been able to catch up on long lost friends. So I love blogs!!! I love reading about your kids and you and just random happenings in your life! I don't put all the bad things on my blogs but sometimes I do have to vent and I don't mind others that do. Becdause then it helps me to know that others are going through the same things also. I learn from them. ANd many others inspire me to be better, try harder and be positive.
Ok I am done rambling! I love blogs, I love to blog and I love to hear about others lives.
And I LOVE YOU KATIE!!!
PS I have a comment to your anonymous writer:
If you feel like you should cancel facebook and your blog, then do it. It is your choice. But I really don't think any of us, espcially Katie, blogs or writes on facebook just to say "look at me". that is not the point of them. I love facebook and I love blogs... so shoot me. I have many friends on facebook and my blog but it isn't because I just want them to look at me and my life! I love keeping in touch with my friends, new and old, and I think it is a good way. ANd no, I would not talk on the phone with every single person on facebook or my blog, but I still care about them and what they are doing. If you feel like it is not personal enough, then quite.
ANyways, I just had to say my 2 cents to you. I don't know who you are but I felt I needed to say something because Katie is my dear friend and we have been best buddies since 3rd grade! She is an amazing person and she cares about people. She does not boast or brag about her life and she really cares about people and what they are doing in their lives. Katie has a lot of friends because she has lived so many places and poelpe love her! SHe is a genuine person and she helps me to be better!
What are we all doing this for anyway? What was the purpose for setting up something like this? We could ask all the questions in the world and never get to the bottom of what really lies beneath each and every thought or shared experience. Nothing and I mean nothing can take the place of conversation. Real conversation, between friends and loved ones. You know the ones that last for hours but only feel like a few minutes...the shared feelings and how those small moments you grow closer to someone because they gave you a little part of themseleves...so again is this really a replacement of those moments...I say NO!! This is a tool to keep in touch with those that are most close to you or to anyone you wish. Not a replacement of you, or shouldn't be! Remember that "We are the musicmakers and we are the dreamers of dreams!"
Hope the Introspect helps and if not then a toast to confusion!!
-Kirk
Hey Kirk. Thanks for your comment. And thanks for EVERYONE for the comments! (And Melissa, you are too dang nice. That's why I love you so much!) This has really been fun. I asked the questions more out of curiousity than confusion. And I really have received a lot of insight from all of you. Thanks! From what I've experienced, I think I still talk to close friends on the phone as much as I ever did before. I would never think blogging would be sufficient to maintain good relationships. But on Facebook, I have absolutely loved being able to leave and receive notes from people that have shared bits and pieces of my life. And yeah, it would be a little wierd to pick up the phone and just call any given acquaintance, especially if it's someone of the opposite sex, like Boston was saying. Overall, I think we all get to decide how we want to use these tools. If they seem to harness bitterness and anger, it's definitely something to reconsider. But if it can be an outlet, a connection, a way to communicate, and show the things that make you happy... I say, On with the blogging and Facebook! Woohoo!! I hope you all have a wonderful new year!! Love, Katie
Well hello! You are such a thinker! I say to myself, I should be more of a thinker! I love reading your blog because I like keeping in touch with you and your cute family! Plus I like to show Nathan pictres of his cousins so he can remember them better. I went private for a lot of reasons and I'm so glad I did. It would take all day to write why because I'm still peckin away at the keyboard with two fingers. I know, Lame! Never learned to type! Call me sometime and we will chat! Love ya!
Hi Katie! I hope you had a good Christmas and New Years. I really enjoy reading your blog. Your family is so cute, and you always have the most insightful things to say. But I agree with everyone else, a blog is for you to do what you want to do with it! I like having one just to keep up with old friends like you! But I know how to get a hold of you otherwise, so either way, you are stuck with me! Love ya!
well, just to add to your long list of comments... :) i blog so i can let friends and family know what is going on in my life. i don't live very close to anyone, and i'm really horrible at keeping in touch, so i guess this is my way of doing it. maybe i'm lazy...
but as far as what to post, i don't really treat it like a journal, cause i don't want everyone reading my journal. it's more of a way to say this is what is going on in my life and this is what i think about it. if you care, read it. if you don't care, don't. i've also thought about going private, but i haven't had any vocal stalkers yet... anyway, there's my opinion.
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